He is a very proud donkey.
He knows what he likes and is not shy telling what he thinks to whomever he encounters.
In fact, he often goes out of his way to share his opinions with those he feels needs it the most.
Just recently, he decided to start giving awards to those deserving people. Fortunately the recipients of the first award he presented was The Bolton Kick Ass Award.
It represents the highest praise he will ever award to anyone.
On the other end of the spectrum is The Bolton Dumb Ass Award. If he was not concerned with being charged with assault and battery, he would award those with a swift kick with both of his hind legs.
Years ago, he was too stubborn to care about the consequences of his actions. He’s a much calmer (and less physical) donkey than he used to be. But sometimes I wish he’d just kick me instead of using his words as weapons.
Usually, The Bolton Ass likes to dominate conversations with tales of his life and his family history. Personally, I’m not sure how much is really history or how much is actually fabricated in his oversized head.
Regardless of what I believe, he does tell some interesting stories.
Subscribe to The Bolton Ass so you can keep up with his most recent award presentations and tales about his unique family history.
He encourages all his readers to nominate people who deserve either The Bolton Kick Ass Award or The Bolton Dumb Ass Award.
He expects to be bombarded with nominations. Most of your nominations will not be accepted. But please understand that nominations accompanied with bribes will be reviewed in the order of the highest monetary values.
Who do you know that is deserving of The Bolton Kick Ass Award or The Bolton Dumb Ass Award? Make a convincing argument and The Bolton Ass might just agree with you and present his next award to someone you know.